I need to admit something. I must say that I haven't always been the person to love. As a Taurus many of the things you'll find about Taurus women through a Google search are actually true, about me. I can be stubborn. I'm also fierce and dedicated. When it comes to work I give it my all. Don't shy away from work. There's definitely a lot of energy within me and hearing the word "no" is something I really dislike. I strongly believe in love – the idea that it is perfectly fine to love people from a distance even if it means they won't be actively involved in your life.
Most of the time I'm willing to sacrifice pleasure if I know that the outcome will be worth it, in the end. Rarely do I chase after people; instead I prefer connections and pleasant encounters. Now let me share with you four relationship mistakes that have cost me greatly in the past. My hope is that by reading this blog post you'll discover your lessons and live a life.
People often ask me questions, about how I became knowledgeable, about relationships and why I feel qualified to speak on the subject. The list of inquiries seems ending. I typically choose not to respond or address them directly. In my opinion my advice and the work I do should speak for themselves. However lets focus on a topic today, Myself.
Surprising as it may seem. I'm, in my thirties now. I must admit that I haven't always been as wise as I am today. In the past I didn't fully appreciate the value of my relationships, which is regrettable. Looking back I realize that I may have been the cause of their heartbreak because truthfully speaking I never believed in giving my all to relationships.
1.) Therefore it's safe to say that my initial mistake was not cherishing and valuing my relationship enough.
It's actually quite common for people to realize that they didn't fully appreciate or value their partner while they were together. This can involve not cherishing the moments neglecting to show gratitude ignoring concerns that were raised during the relationship or not putting time and effort into it.
Personally I've always struggled with multitasking. I mean I do try to juggle tasks to some extent. It can be so draining that I often end up dropping the ball in other areas. My biggest strength and weakness is my ability to focus. When something catches my interest I know how to zero in, on it. Become really immersed. So when faced with a life challenge that requires my attention it becomes difficult for me to share that focus with anything. In a way I become obsessed and unfortunately other people and things, in my life tend to suffer because of it.
I must say though there are three things that I've had to learn in order to improve myself and overcome this obsession or mistake.
A. In my relationships I had to understand the importance of open communication.
You know there are times when your partner may not fully grasp or appreciate the significance of what you're trying to achieve. They may not offer their support. These situations can lead to problems arising from directions. So for your relationship to thrive while you pursue your goals it's important to have conversations, with your partner. Discuss your aspirations and commitments in both growth and the relationship itself. Find ways in which you can mutually support each other in pursuing passions while maintaining a bond between you both. Then make an effort to put those plans into action.
B. It was crucial for me to spend quality time with my partner.
Designate specific moments for date nights. Shared activities where you can simply relax together. During these times focus on being fully present. Avoid distractions like work or personal devices. For example do you have a rule in place where phones are off limits during these moments? To address my tendency towards distraction I also implemented a practice.
C. I had to establish boundaries and allocate time, for work, personal growth and my relationship.
The key takeaway is that it's important to establish a schedule that enables you to pursue your passions while also ensuring you have time, for your partner. Stick, to these boundaries. Communicate any adjustments or changes as time progresses. If needed negotiate your time with your partner. If they truly care about you they should understand why it's essential for you to have space and time to do what you love as it will ultimately help you thrive.
2.) Moving on another mistake I made in my relationships was disregarding warning signs. Ignoring my gut instincts.
As I mentioned earlier in this blog I'm a Taurus. I value loyalty and love deeply. Sometimes when you're infatuated with someone it can be challenging to see beyond their facade. It's common for people to present versions of themselves that aren't entirely pleasant when you first meet them. However the excitement and emotions can cloud your judgment. For instance they may be rude, to others. Treat you with kindness because they have feelings for you. Perhaps they neglect their space but make an effort to tidy up when they visit your place. It's important to acknowledge that people cannot be changed by others; they can only change themselves. They should make any changes for their growth rather than solely for someone elses sake.
We often admire qualities in our partners like their fierceness and independence. However we tend to forget that these attributes are rooted in the principles they hold dear and live by consistently. It becomes problematic when the very qualities we once admired start causing conflicts or dissatisfaction in the relationship.
It's crucial not to ignore warning signs, red flags or gut instincts before a relationship becomes serious. These indicators play a role, in understanding issues or concerns and should never be dismissed under the guise of love.
It's important to never ignore values, disregard concerning behaviors or dismiss your intuition when it tells you that the current relationship isn't right, for you. Ignoring these flags often leads to consequences.
3.) One of the mistakes I made in relationships was settling for less than what I deserved.
Having standards can sometimes cause you to miss out on love but on the other hand settling for just anyone because you feel like there are no other options is likely to result in failure and unhappiness, from the start.
When I was younger I found myself involved with individuals whom I wasn't truly interested, in. In my vulnerability I thought it might be worth giving them a chance to see how things would unfold. Unfortunately it turned out to be an experience for both of us. He never received the attention or love he desired from me. I felt suffocated by his presence. As a result I gradually spent less time with him. Perhaps he still harbors some resentment towards me.
The lesson here is to never settle for someone when your heart isn't fully invested because such relationships only breed resentment. It's essential not to find yourself in a situation where you realize after a breakup that you settled for someone who didn't meet your expectations or treated you poorly. You'll regret not valuing yourself to pursue a more fulfilling relationship. Trust me when I say that being in a relationship where you constantly desire more or settling despite being mistreated will only lead to heartbreak.
4.) One significant mistake that had consequences, for me was my inability to be emotionally present and available.
Emotional availability plays a role, in establishing intimacy and connection. Yesterday I had a conversation with a man through my one on one relationship advice service. He expressed his frustration and dissatisfaction with his relationship, in quite a manner. I patiently listened to him for 40 minutes as he vented about his girlfriend.
I mentioned that I'm curious, about the source of your pain. He replied that he had discovered his girlfriend cheating on him with another man, which deeply hurt him. They had been in a relationship for seven years. Now his current girlfriend is experiencing the consequences of his detachment and coldness. I can relate to this situation because I've been through experiences. When someone you love betrays you in such a way it's natural to build walls, around yourself to protect your heart. It's a response aimed at facilitating healing. If not managed properly it can have negative effects. I apologize for what you've gone.
However it is important for you to gradually let your guard down if you want to experience love. Learn from your mistakes. Don't make the next person suffer for someone elses wrongdoing. I have personally been emotionally distant, in some of my relationships. I can assure you that all the time and effort I put into them ended up being in vain. Nowadays I firmly believe in either embracing something or not getting involved at all. Remember, when you're in a relationship you're dealing with people who have emotions and feelings. If you can't give them your self it might be better to walk and let them find someone who can truly listen and be there, for them.
I've made these mistakes so that some of you who are currently reading this blog post don't have to. If you've found yourself guilty of any of these work on self improvement to become better. It's definitely possible to have thriving relationships well, as well as finding true love.
Now let me share something I came across today. We all search for that one person who's perfect for us but after experiencing enough relationships we start questioning if there really is a "right" person or just various versions of wrong. The reason behind this is that each of us has our flaws and imperfections and we tend to seek out partners who complement those imperfections in some way.
However it takes time and life experiences to embrace our flaws and realize what we truly need in a lifelong partner. It's only when we confront our fears and unsolvable issues that make us who we are that we become ready to find the match for ourselves. When we do find them they may not be "perfect ". They will be the right kind of imperfect, for us – someone whom we can lovingly look at and say, "This is the kind of problem I want in my life." So lets us allow our scars to fall in love.