A few months ago there was a lot of buzz, on social media when American actress Gabriel Union appeared on a podcast called "Idea Generation." During the interview she openly shared that she and her basketball player husband Dwayne Wade split their bills evenly 50-50. This sparked some debate among women. It made me wonder what the real issue is here. Is it about Gabrielle Union being self reliant? Is it because she's married to a billionaire husband? I don't think it's a matter of living beyond her means as some people on media suggested. She has always been open about her mindset. Has even dealt with anxiety while also taking care of households besides her own.
Since we don't know the situation of this power couple I'd like to address a few questions that I believe need answering. Is this an issue of entitlement from women who are expressing their dissatisfaction with the 50 50 split? Is it about women taking on more responsibilities than men, in relationships particularly when it comes to maintaining the household? Should any working woman not have to contribute in cases?
Lets start by addressing why many women feel upset, about this
I've noticed that on the media some people are saying that the unfairness stems from her husband earning five times more than she does. They argue that a 50-50 split wouldn't be fair in this case. However there are others who believe that she was being too masculine in her role as a wife. Additionally some commenters mentioned that because he has children to support in their marriage it wouldn't make sense for them to split things equally.
Let me share my thoughts on each of these points.
Firstly we need to consider the fact that her husband earns money than she does. Frankly speaking I find it puzzling how many people on media tend to jump to conclusions without knowing the picture. We don't live with them. Have insights into their arrangements and commitments regarding their home and other aspects of their lives. I'm not claiming to know more than anyone but there could be various scenarios, at play here.
Scenario A;
She takes care of one aspect of maintaining the family while her husband takes care of the other. Without delving into the details of whether their roles are perfectly divided she mentioned during an interview that they aim for a partnership. I don't believe it means they're literally counting every coin to ensure contributions, from both partners. To put things in perspective she jokingly asked her to be husband Dwayne for a prenup even admitting on television that she had never seen him balance a checkbook. It seems she wanted to protect her assets and establish herself as a star rather than solely relying on his fame from the beginning. It's worth noting that Gabrielle Union has always been successful, in her right.
Scenario B;
For the sake of this argument lets assume they were equally splitting their bills and meticulously tracking expenses. However some women who criticize her for this seem to have a sense of entitlement. I wouldn't solely blame them for having such a mindset. However I must also mention that many men have contributed to this situation by taking on roles in maintaining the well being of their families and not behaving as gentlemen.
I'm not just talking about financial support here. Many women choose to stay at home and take care of their families or are asked to do so by their husbands or parents. While some women enjoy being the primary caretaker, not all women are wired that way. There is a significant number of women who also want to pursue their own dreams.
However, I must admit that the toxic sense of entitlement I mentioned earlier comes from my thoughts on why modern working women often feel entitled to an uneven division of responsibilities. We can delve into the discussion of the gender pay gap, whether women receive equal pay for equal work, as well as arguments about patriarchy and how modern working women have to juggle both their jobs and household responsibilities with little or no help from men. These are all valid points worth considering. We could even explore how cultural and geographical factors play a role in shaping these dynamics.
I personally don't believe that every person is inherently responsible, for the care of another individual. As a parent there are obligations in some countries to ensure your children are well cared for and given an upbringing. However once they reach the age of 18 the law no longer holds you accountable for these obligations. That's why its puzzling to me when grown women believe that a man should be solely responsible for their well being simply because they're married or dating them especially when they have their means of independence. I mean if a woman meets a man who genuinely wants to support her that's great and wonderful.
What I struggle to comprehend is the sense of entitlement behind this expectation. Lets set aside beliefs and societal norms for a moment and consider arguments, about abuse, which I acknowledge exists and affects women on a daily basis.
But honestly, I wonder why some women seem to have a sense of entitlement in a union or relationship. It should be about taking care of ourselves and each other, but every couple should have the freedom to define what that means for them. I would love to hear your thoughts on this specific issue in the comments below.
Now, moving on to another social media comment.
Someone mentioned how Gabrielle Union was being too masculine as a wife. Masculine energy is strong, stable and self confident. These are actually positive traits to possess. So, it doesn't make sense to use that against her from where I stand. However, don't get me wrong. Even if she's married to a wealthy husband, she won't rely on him for everything. In my opinion, that's a smart move because life is unpredictable. Tomorrow is never guaranteed, so it's wise for any sensible person to be self reliant and independent to some extent. After all, good parents raise their children to be self sufficient, regardless of gender. I feel the need to express my thoughts because the negativity, in the media is truly appalling.
Regarding splitting the bills unequally, I have a question for those who argue against it; Wasn't she aware of the responsibilities they would have together before getting married? It's been reported that she even knew about Dwyane Wade having a baby with someone else just months before their marriage and still chose to proceed with the wedding.
Personally, I believe in fully committing or not committing at all. Many people nowadays enter relationships half heartedly, which is unfair to them. If you're not ready for the commitments that come with being in a relationship, it's better to stay single. For instance, Gabrielle Union shouldn't have to neglect her own daughter while Dwayne's kids go hungry. Otherwise, those same people who criticize her now would be quick to vilify her on social media if she did otherwise.
I think that finding a balance or what I like to call "going 50-50," is a wise approach for modern couples. It helps create an equal partnership in several aspects. Firstly, when both partners contribute equally to household chores, finances and decision making, it establishes a sense of fairness and mutual respect. Each person feels valued and heard as they have an equal say in important matters, actively shaping their shared life.
Moreover, the 50-50 approach enhances communication within the relationship. When couples work together to divide tasks and make joint decisions, it encourages open and honest dialogue – a crucial ingredient for success. This collaborative effort reduces stress and prevents feelings of being overwhelmed. By sharing the workload equally, both partners can avoid resentment and burnout.
It's evident that going 50-50 contributes to a happier and more harmonious relationship. It allows each individual to pursue their interests, hobbies and career goals while fostering personal growth. This sense of independence enriches the partnership as both individuals bring their fulfilled selves to the table.
Conclusion
In summary, embracing a balanced approach like going 50-50 paves the way for individual fulfillment while strengthening the bond between partners. Feel free to share your thoughts and opinions in the comments section below. I'm interested in hearing what you have to say because these perspectives matter.